OLRG: Misguided Nymph, Horny Chileans, and Oxygen Choices Edition

I’m pretty sure, my theory is, and have formulated a hypothesis that the new Battle.net interface has ruined my life. My eyesight is going, my work ethic crumbling, and procrastination levels have reached code red. It is just too damn easy to click and fall into a game of Hearthstone (priests: I hate you). It is the first official Monday of my summer sabbatical (unpaid, unstructured, and unappreciated) but I am mustering determination to get the nitty-gritty stuff done I’ve been putting off forever. Garage? Yes please. Bills and paper work? Why, sure, don’t mind if I do. Hang up silk blouse and put away clean underwear? Now you’ve gone too far. So today is list day, and with a list I shall arm myself with concrete/sequential goodness. I treated myself yesterday and went to a university bookstore. I swear: what is it about the smell of used textbooks and insignia T-shirts that make me swoon with nostalgia? There is no sweeter aroma than perhaps a baby’s head than the smell of academia for me.

But I digress. (It’s what I do.) Saturday, a much needed goofing-off time in the land of Ulduar with my buddies (welcome back, Helke!) and as always a pleasure Tome and Breige. Tome got to hear the story of how I lost my mage:

Dear Blizzard Customer: We sometimes wonder how you managed to survive in the real world this long.
Dear Blizzard Customer: We sometimes wonder how you managed to survive in the real world this long.

I thought this was a very charming letter. I am sure the Customer Service representatives’ lives are just as ordinary as the rest of ours, however I think it would be fun to write these correspondences, too. Here’s the thing: when I am stressed, I spend money. It’s part of process addiction responses, I am sure, a coping mechanism that brings about more trouble than it’s worth. Don’t ask me about this mage. I’ll just say I thought I was deleting a new druid and because my eyesight is crappy, and things were stressful a few weeks ago, and maybe there was a shot of Silver Patron tequila involved, I deleted an expensive mage. SHUT UP. Okay, okay. I discovered her loss (and this is a true story) when I had Zeptepi make her some glacial robes (because this mage’s theme is all blue and frosty) and when I went to transmog her she…wasn’t there. Now, we all know mages are tricksters, but this was even beyond normal mage shenanigans. My anagnorisis pained me: I had deleted her. Off to the customer service buttons! Click click type bring her back spell! And there she was, intact, none the worse for wear, but a bit peeved. (It’s hard to tell if a frost mage is giving you the cold shoulder.)

Mirror, mirror...
Mirror, mirror…

In any case, her name is Keaek: I wanted a palindromic name for a mirror-mage, and I admit she’s a bit too self-possessed for me at times, and I have a lot to learn about frost mages. Mostly she’ll be a fashionista, and if I learn more about frost mages along the way, all the better:

Smoke and Mirrors
Smoke and Mirrors

On Saturday, as mentioned we did a quick run through Ulduar, and Helke picked up a great set of leather goggles!

Want.
Want.

I find that Ulduar’s sensibilities are quite Steampunk. Which reminds me of two new addictions of late: Weird Tales Magazine feed – the illustrations will make you gasp on a daily basis, guaranteed. I mean, seriously:

Crescent Debris, Deviantart
Crescent Debris, Deviantart

I have also been enjoying the photography/illustrations from Gothic Beauty magazine. I do not dress like this. I own no black lipstick. I am too old and too Yankee Doodle for this. But I swear, I have an outer wardrobe, and most certainly an “inner” wardrobe.

From Gothic Beauty
From Gothic Beauty

 

Now, you’re probably wondering about the title of this post. Who wouldn’t? Well, I have been watching movies again. Actually watching them. Not just looking at my laptop while it’s on, but getting into it. This multitasking bullshit is taking its toll, and is highly overrated. In fact, when they say the devil is in the details, its big brother is Satan is a multi-tasker. I noticed there, in Freya’s forest, a beautiful nymph named simply dubbed “Misguided,” and that led me to wonder, what exactly would a nymph do to be deemed misguided? I mean, really- think about it. Nymphs by nature enjoy sexual liberation, scoff at “shaming” of any kind, and have a robust interest in pleasure. What’s not to like? So if she is misguided, does that mean she’s joined a religious missionary and is out spreading the gospel, trying to convert her lusty, lascivious friends to a life of chastity and…boredom? She is misguided indeed.

The Naiad - John Williams Waterhouse
The Naiad – John Williams Waterhouse

Next: Horny Chileans. Watch ‘The Secret Life of Walter Mitty,’ and you’ll see this small but humorous plot point. And much like the protagonist, Walter Mitty, I hope to make some of my own oxygen choices and get up, get out, and do things.

Recommended movies:

Movie 43

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

8 thoughts on “OLRG: Misguided Nymph, Horny Chileans, and Oxygen Choices Edition”

  1. I love that letter, almost makes me want to delete someone to see what I get. I’ll probably do it accidentally sooner or later anyway. And if Cat knew about those goggles she might have put up a fight about not going!

    1. Haha! Zeppez would be so cute for a gnome or goblin warlock or mage! Tomemot is definitely a Tauren…I love those ideas! Please don’t think my lack of communication has anything to do with you, by the way – I miss you!

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