RTMT: Oh no.


Today’s Random Tuesday Morning Thought is sponsored by “Ignorance and Hatred: When you just can’t seem to live in peace, call us!”

In other words, “Oh no, it’s Tuesday maintenance, I rushed downstairs in the wee hours of the morning for nothing, so I guess I had better confront some issues.” All this before coffee.

Too loaded? Oh yes.

Yesterday I learned a new word: doxing. 

I had read this word in many posts, and then last night realized I couldn’t use context clues solely to figure it out.

I read the word about this post, and this one, and really appreciated Sheep the Diamond’s post.

Now: When I brought this up to CD Rogue when I heard of the vile harassment Sarkeesian received, he said no gender is free from sexual harassment and abuse, and this is sadly true. Women also, in perhaps this gender’s effort to be “just like the guys” also use [sexual/workplace] power to intimidate and harass. I told him, though, there comes a time when the broad brush of bullshit isn’t the conversation, but the details, the specifics, are. I asked him if we could focus the conversation. For example, I can’t think of a time when a man was told this:

From PC Mag
From PC Mag

Well, okay. Perhaps Edward Snowden was told this. Several times, I suppose. But he wasn’t told to stop making games–he was trying to save us from ourselves.

People use love as a weapon. They make it something not love, resembling nothing like love, till it becomes monstrous hatred. What really galls me, the terrible truth, is that somewhere there is an ex-boyfriend, and he will find another woman to date, perhaps marry, and that woman who thinks “she can change him,” or he was right in issuing death threats is somehow ‘bad boy sexy.’ She is the one who undermines us all, men and women. I had to explain to a young squire the other day why it was important that women are paid the same as men for the same work. Yes, it’s 2014. He asked why, so I told him: wouldn’t he want his mother, or future wife to be healthy, have the ability to support their family and life equally as him? Logic, young squire. Logic.

I asked CD Rogue, “Why aren’t parents explaining moral, ethical and common sense treatment of other humans?” He said no one thinks about the next step. We have always discussed social issues with our cubs. Are parents assuming their children are getting it somewhere? God help us all if they think the Internet is doing a good job.

So: a plea to my friends in Azeroth: never hurt me, be kind, and enjoy the friendship we share. I do believe we make things better, and it’s the only way to destroy darkness is by light. This battle is ageless, and will never end, so we might as well make each other strong with love. Logical? Oh yes.



7 thoughts on “RTMT: Oh no.”

  1. I have seen so much ignorance and stupidity recently in regards to this (among other things) and I am so angry that I seriously want to make those people suffer, because they clearly have no idea what it feels like. I cannot abide people holding a position and being unwilling to see the damage it causes, or dismissing it as unimportant when they are challenged, or refusing to actually THINK about what they are saying.

    I do not understand why people like CD Rogue react the way they do. Why can you not simply acknowledge the evil that has been committed, without qualifying it? Why do you always have to deny the extent of the problem, or diminish the impact that it has, or try to indirectly defend those who cause the problems in the first place – usually by launching counterattacks in the vein of “well X happens to Y too, you know”. How much can it cost you to agree that yes, X is horrible and wtf is wrong with those people, *and then close your mouth*?!

    I am a pretty useless excuse for a human being right now, but I do have one skill that I am confident enough to assert. I am good at critical thinking. I see so many people displaying their utter contempt for that skill. My faith in humanity has been worn down to a nub. Even people who I used to respect…I can see why a lot of bloggers/gamers keep their online relationships at arms length. Discovering more about people you spend time with – even at a distance – is not always a good thing.

    1. Well, to be fair to CD Rogue, his experience was fairly egregious. And being the mother of two sons, I am very interested in making sure everyone understands fairness and respect. I am amazed that you understood what I was talking about – that sometimes I just want to talk about what the topic is, and examine it. You do have incredible critical thinking powers – all too rare in this world.

      1. I’m sure it was, and it’s terrible that he had that experience, but the fact remains that you weren’t talking about his experience, his experience was not relevant to what you were talking about except in the sense that he would have more understanding of exactly how horrible the topic was.

        I know that most of the time these reflexive derailments are not deliberate, nor malicious, but it is incredibly frustrating and draining when so much of your effort has to be devoted to trying to drag the conversation back to the original topic. Especially so when it happens Every. Gorram. Time. And then people wonder why so many of us who care about social justice issues are curt, ill-tempered or sharp-tongued in those conversations.

  2. Thank you! I didn’t know that word either. I just don’t know what’s wrong with people. I read Stubborn’s comparison to unsocialized dogs. One of our dogs who came from a rescue was indeed dangerous because of her fear but with a lot of love and training it can be overcome. Is that what these people lack? Anyway the whole thing makes me sad.

    And jeez, I know what Dahakha means. Every time I see an actor or singer I like about to be interviewed I quickly turn it off. Don’t want to ruin a good thing by finding out what they’re really like. Except Steve Buscemi who seems like someone you’d like to have a beer or an OLRG night with.

  3. I think I’m the opposite – I like knowing what the real person is like. Even if I disagree with them, accepting their differences makes me understand them better. But yes Stubborn did put it VERY well, I think!

    Part of the problem is how we deal with a person’s difference in opinion. I object to smoking. But so many people still do it – I keep educating them but the still want to do it, and I cannot for the life of me see why they want to do it. If they are not hurting anyone then I guess I can tolerate it. But if they insist of subjecting their children to passive smoking without a care then I would be very outraged.

    It’s a bit like people’s opinions on these controversial topics which polarise communities – racism, feminism, harrassment. Hurting others is never ok. But I think that it’s a bit harsh to be angry at the fence sitters for doing nothing or having an opinion that doesn’t hurt anyone because they don’t align with your own opinion.

    These internet harrassments are horrible. Those dogs really need to be socialised more.

    1. Sometimes I think the “fence sitters” are doing more good than people realize. There are a thousand ways to educate, support, and promote peace and love, and those ways need respect too.

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