Warning: Zuls may cause boots inserted into fanny.*

I really, really wanted to work my way to that silly chest piece.

Last night, tried to tank a Zul with guildmates. Not too bad. But, I was tired, I mean like bone-tired and fatigued, and needed it to go fast. I see, before every wipe, (and there were a few), one guildmate typing strings of guildchat. And not just once. Many, many times. But, I don’t know this guildmate that well, and wasn’t in a frame of mind to ask him not to do that, but to focus on the fights. The healer was newer, too, and seems like a nice enough guy. The least this rogue could have done was perhaps, gee, dps for a bit? I bowed out, leveled up tailoring on my priest, and went to bed. No reason to make everyone feel the fatigue I was feeling, too.

Brand new day, and decide to try again with a PUG.

The rogue and shadow priest were doing about 6-9k on average, never breaking above that. We got through every boss until the last one. There were some stupid mob wipes, mostly people pulling aggro, but no matter. It happens. The rogue won the BoE ring, on a need roll, so hope he knows it is soulbound. We didn’t wipe on any bosses, even though their dps was quite low. (Did I mention their dps was low?)

Healer is a little bossy. They are sometimes. But damn, I did impress myself with my skills as far as cooldowns, taunts, etc. I used Hand of Reckoning, and often, and except for the elemental shaman, I have the highest dps: granted, I didn’t WANT to be the highest, but thought, how good it would be to keep everyone safe and happy.

And then the last boss.

So close to my 140 Valor Points.

If I got those points, and then perhaps ran one or two more Zuls today, I would be one week closer to that chest piece, instead of two.

But, running back, after one wipe (dps very low, healer got eaten, sigh) I stupidly, STUPIDLY, got one pixel too close to a baddie and was quickly killed.

You know what happened next.


Now, I realize, after I’ve calmed down a bit, that their frustration with me is just a case of Zul rage. I get it. And my own embarrassment and anger is due to:
1. I hate that Blizz forces us to go into that many Zuls for VP/week. I can see forcing one or even two, but to cap out heroics at 490 just seems cruel:
2. Which leads me to the fact that I just don’t have the time to run that many Zuls on two characters. This is the “I am a grownup with a job, a job that pays for this silly game, am quite put out right now.”
3. I think one should be immune to being kicked on a final boss. Period.
4. My friend told me that I should have chosen to kick someone earlier, that way I would have been immune — so, in other words, become the thing I hate. Become the pendejo who kicks low dps players, become mean-spirited, callous, and smug. (Not in my nature. Not going to happen. Which is why I wouldn’t have lasted one episode on ‘Survivor.’ I would have done that TV show just for the diet tips. Easy to lose weight when you can’t crack open a coconut or spear fish.)

Which brings me full circle: I am the grown-up here.

I will not make those mistakes again, and will reflect on the things I did right, which were many. Those Zuls will become as easy for Luperci as they are now for Matty, I have no doubt.

As I dislodge the boot from my tail and put on ointment in the knife wounds in back, realizing I just need to shrug this one off. I still say running with guildmates who give a damn about me and my success would be better. Considering the four hours I ran with a guild tank the first time through, they owe me that much. No typing in guild chat. No kicking. The reward will be greater than having another guild tank on hand, at your beck and call. I’d give up my satchel of gumballs for that.

Not the first time I’ll be kicked, I’m sure, nor the last. First kick stings the most, though.

*No, my NZ friend. Not that kind of fanny.


Zeptepi emptied the dust and shards from her pockets. She could not complete her training. The was one obstacle: gold. She knew her sisters had been trying diligently to support each other. The reality was this: since their parents’ absence, they were on their own. And since none of them were to give themselves over to indentured slavery or other unsavory exploits (least of all marriage to a fat, ugly nobleman – gads!), their independence was a bit starved on occasion.
The unexpected patronage and friendship came from the horizon: gold never buys friendship, not friendship of any real value. Those who recognize that gold and gifts are merely the ease to increase life’s enjoyment fully get the most of those lives.* The boost, the aid, helped her have the next bit of courage she needed to get to the next step, steps she could now, and forever more, take with a friend.
*How many parables does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? King Midas, Ebenezer Scrooge, and Gollum all seemed to get this.

Fool for Zul

Five little guildmates, going to Zul

this one tripped on venom, started to drool
Four little guildmates, battling panthers black
nothing is as wonderful as getting kicked in the sack
Three little guildmates, taunting gods, all tiki
this one pulled more, things got kind of kinky

Two little guildmates, making a stand
healer goes off line, in panties must have gotten sand
One little guildmate, going native and solo
talking smack in guild-chat, thinking he’s cholo
Finished the dungeon
and got all the loot
Should have long ago given tank the boot

Postscript: Desperately seeking cracker-jack team to help get my tanking skills polished for Zuls.